Dot's personal timeline, a place to collect and share things from Dot's life.
Created by dotlizard on Oct 18, 2008
Last updated: 11/04/10 at 09:02 AM
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you know, it's time.
it's not like this is a new thing, but i'm not even sure if most of my friends even know this about me. since most of my socializing is online (yes, it is, so what?) anyway, i'm not at all sure they notice when they are in a bad way and ask for prayers, and i mumble something comforting and/or do the old 'you are in my thoughts' & send hugs, love, comfort, etc. i haven't been in a discussion about this with anyone, and that's ok, i have no driving need to debate anyone on the subject, as i do not disagree with anyone's personal beliefs - those are yours, these are mine, and this shouldn't feel like that much of a big deal, yet it does.
the closest i've come is to change my religious preference on facebook to pastafarian, quietly & without fanfare.
i'm not even sure why it is so difficult to come right out and say it: i'm an atheist.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2009/08/losing-my-religion-2/
i do not unfollow and/or unsubscribe lightly. i appreciate and enjoy having many sources of information and entertainment, and i certainly do not decide to unfollow based on a difference of opinion – i appreciate different perspectives, as long as they are logical, well-thought out, and expressed with some grace and dignity. well, this is not that. this is just ugly, and not fancy ugly – plain. i am not unfollowing @dcagle (and unsubscribing to his newsletter) because we differ in opinions. i am unfollowing because the above is a classless example of either (a) going for the cheap shot in order to stir up controversy (traffic, views, mentions, @s), or (b) whatever other reason was behind this, who knows or cares. matters not. i took the day to evaluate whether or not the content provided by the newsletter and tweets had enough value to me for me to overlook this thoughtlessness. these feeds did have some value, but, to borrow the words of @catawu, “I can't support something that is mean-spirited or proudly devoid of compassion or intelligence.” ignoring the overwhelming amount of good that Ted Kennedy did in favor of hawking about a once-juicy forty year old scandal is either sleazy or just plain lazy. and ugly, either way. does it matter that one little follower, 1 of 52,996 who linked to a few cartoons from her modest social media accounts, unfollowed? nope. hell nope! do i feel a whole lot better, cathartically clicking those “un” buttons? yes, yes i do.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2009/08/on-unfollowing/
talk about an ear-worm. stupid commercial gets in my *dreams*, man.
anyway, don't believe the ugly rumors that i'm "redesigning" (whatever that means) my "blog" (whatever!) without even the common decency to develop in an offline manner & then publish a finished product. how tacky to have ones CSS battles right out in public! who will think of the children! or the cows! they're the size of schnauzers, seriously!
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2009/08/theyre-cows-the-size-of-schnauzers-but-theyre-cattle/
If you have an ASUS Eee PC 1000HE , you probably want to install Windows 7. You may not even realize it, but trust me, you do. It’s easy, it’s safe, and it’s beautiful :).
For starters, I’m going to recommend you upgrade to 2GB of RAM, Crucial Technology DDR2 PC2-6400 Memory is what you'll want for that. You could probably make do with the original 1GB, but you won’t be doing a lot of multitasking.
Have I mentioned how easy it is? Because it is, totally. There are a lot of instructions out there on the internets that talk about installing it from an SD card, but I tried that, and it sucked, so I found a way better way. What are you waiting for? The EEE’s roomy 160GB hard drive is already partitioned for your dual booting pleasure – for that is what I am recommending, dual booting. You’ll get the choice of which OS every time you start up.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2009/05/windows-7-ultimate-on-the-eee-pc-1000he/
"perhaps taking the spam somewhere else would be advisable."
in response to a lighthearted hopeful invitation to something i'd been working on & have a strong desire to see succeed. in retrospect yes this was spam. obviously it was, it's spam if it's called spam & that's that, right? in context, arguments could be made that i'd always been relevant &/or at least on topic in communications with this accuser, and in this case ... well i flat put my foot in my mouth, or at least the variant of that you do with fingers on keys. i was wrong in that way you know wrong after you've done it & while it still does not feel anything like that, yet, the consequences are clear.
that felt far more awful than it should have. there are no worse words i could be called, or have used in sentences that referred to my actions. none. they not only do not exist, they *can* not exist.
my head hurts.
and even though this is the first time i've blogged in howevermany months, the thought of linking to this from anywhere for any reason seems like ... feels like ... well what if there is a spammer in me, one i can't see out of some blind stupid faith in my own pleasant intentions?
and yeah. i am overreacting. yes i am. yes i know.
spam? yeah. spam.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2009/03/in-a-word/
this post shall serve as my third entry (one by comment, one by tweet, one here) to the amazing contest being held on various blogs, in this case, Tamar Weinberg's awesome Techipedia.com. The sponsor is Sears, who already has a warm fuzzy place in my heart for their tremendous support of the Extreme Makeover, Home Edition show, which is one of my favorite shows to watch while sniffling happily. i'm a big softie, is what i am.
find the contest and enter here, for your chance to win one of three awesome prize packages. the one i'd pick is the Family Fun Package.
i may have ulterior motives for this contest entry, but that's neither here nor there :)
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/12/blogger-outreach-sears-style/
See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/12/prop-8-the-musical/
i try to reserve the concept of hate for instances which are most deserving of it, since i personally disapprove of hatred, in spite of my own regrettable inability to divorce my self from the actual practice of hating. hate is wrong, & yet i hate. i hate stuff all the time. such is this hypocrisy, mine.
i fancy my self an in iconoclast, a rebel with or without any particular real reason to exist in a state of rebellion. & yet i am the sort of person who will endure seven & maybe even eighteen years of ridiculously suppressive influence & make only the most abortive & pathetic attempts to prevail & escape.
& yes, i am still here. & so what of this this of the progressive, this lip service to strength which i fail entirely to demonstrate in my own (not pathetic, but only barely) life? well what of it. i can have my beliefs & live in something entirely less than them & still believe, right?
well that's the whole question right there, isn't it? where are my gonzo values where it comes to this life, mine? how do i reconcile the vast chasm between my self & these beliefs, mine?
in a word (or two)? i don't. wait, that's three words, technically. fuck them, they're just words. what of these actions &/or the lack thereof, mine?
there is no excuse. there are reasons, but they are contemptible & weak. i believe there was once strength in me, but i cannot swear to that as truth. there is no reality but the one i have surrendered my self into now, here. & it is absolutely true that this here/now is not what i not what i felt i was meant to be. but it is what i worked for, & what i (apparently) deserve.
hear the uncertainty there? the wishful bullshit inherent in me saying maybe this is somehow undeserved, that the resignation with which i approach the rest of my lease on physical consciousness might somehow turn out to be misguided? that i might only be indulging in some sort of inappropriate self-flagellation when i claim i've relinquished hope of any transcendent connection ever in favor of ... whatever ... & that was actually supposed to be a sentence & make sense, as if!
i had a thing to say but it was contemptible & weak. for the record, i did have good intentions at some point. where they are now, i cannot tell you, because, well, whenever this happens, my dog crawls up into my lap & uses her nose to dislodge my arms from reaching the keyboard, & i forget.
anyway. here i am writing this & the chance of it being read being remote, i feel freed to go ahead & admit it, i am a hypocrite. i talk a big game but in the end i surrender, & not in that good way. it's just contemptible & weak.
oh well, at least it's easy.
under the bridges, over the phone,
wind on the water, carry me home ...
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/11/hypocrisy-mine/
if only i were the wishing type, i'd be on about wanting to stay up even later, typing typing typing, or involved in something else which would somehow still enable me to express my self without the tiny annoying tapping noises that might wake the sleeping forces outside of me keeping me now from saying, in fullness, what i am trying to say.
tequila helps. & if only i could hold my self to my new theme of social consciousness, & refrain from this descent into selfish subconsious nonsense, well, that would be good too. this would be a better blog for that, but alas, it is not.
as it is i am the embodiment of the spirit of all my own undoings, & this post will not deviate bravely from that, as most of the last few posts have attempted to do.
it is late. i am alone. any delusions of other than aloneness were purely that, & nothing further. i leave this note to my self to remind me of this, in case i wake from dreams suggesting otherwise. i often do that, you know. i live this life in my sleep wild beyond any i might hope to live awake. i have these dreams real as day, & you can not tell me they do not constitute an alternative to what we consider 'real' in the world. i have these dreams as tangible as anything, i really do. but it's all impulses traveling down the synapses, everything is.
perception isn't everything, it's the only thing.
i have these dreams, you see.
& on occasion stay up 'till near dawn dreaming them across these keys, in a way that suggests reality but is decidedly disingenuous in doing so. & i am (in this case at least) not alone in this deception, inflammatory influences (for once) not all my own have driven these things to consume most of me & what i perceive to be my physical self. & this, i confess, is sweetness indeed. & for the moment, this moment & the ones just before it & perhaps just a delicious few more, this defines the concept of pleasure to me. but then again words are defined by other words, which means these feelings are as real as these words, & nothing more.
& so i tap them into being on these keys, in order that i may dismiss them like the dreams they are, no matter how well-documented their existence.
existence can not be documented in text, especially at this hour.
it cannot be put into words, & not just because words make typing sounds & it is not the time for that. mostly, it is because the entire pursuit is consumed, by its very nature. by futility.
words. that's it. nothing more.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/11/words-are-defined-by-other-words-so-nevermind/
isn't that a great name for a Supreme Court case? i thought so.
what i thought even more amazing was this text, from the decision:
Marriage is one of the ‘basic civil rights of man,’ fundamental to our very existence and survival…. To deny this fundamental freedom on so unsupportable a basis as the racial embodied in these statutes, so directly subversive of the principle of equality at the heart of the Fourteenth Amendment, is surely to deprive all the State’s citizens of liberty without due process of law. The Fourteenth Amendment requires that the freedom of choice to marry not be restricted by invidious racial discriminations. Under our Constitution, the freedom to marry, or not to marry, a person of another race resides with the individual and cannot be infringed by the State.
and with that, in 1964, the Racial Integrity Act of 1924 was overturned, once and for all. the anti-miscegenation laws are now far behind us, but do you know that until 1991, we would not have had a voting majority to agree. i'm very glad that interracial couples did not have to wait until 1991 for the general public (who are notorious assholes, as a group) to agree that it was ok for them to have this 'basic civil right'.
[caption align="alignnone" width="500" caption="equal rights should NEVER be subjected to a public vote"][/caption]
quote, and Supreme Court case, discovered reading Robot Monkey Pants.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/11/loving-v-virginia/
i used to be just a personal blog. i used to be allll about me & occasionally about my computer, and for some reason it feels a little odd to shift focus like this, especially to a single issue, social &/or political. demonstrating this, i start this post out talking more about me, me, me. yeah, it's all about ... to change. well, not all. but this is change. i'm a lizard, i kick the habit, shed my skin.
trying to figure out why it is i've attached myself to the cause of marriage equality. best excuse reason i can come up with is, this is my civil rights movement. i was approximately 2.5 years of age when Dr. King gave his "I Have a Dream" speech in the march on Washington. although i did (in my own, elementary school periphery) follow the civil rights movement, i did not live in an atmosphere that encouraged that. my parents would never, not in a bazillion years attended a protest, let alone taken me to one. but in my own, ADD-out-of-the-corner-of-my-eye-distracted-daydreamy type of way, i did follow. i did also spectate the summer of love, at age six & living just across the bay from San Francisco, watching the hippies on the news and ... daydreaming. & as soon as i was old enough to think up reasonable reasons to do so, i would take the bus down Bancroft Avenue & end up in Berkeley in People's Park hanging out with vagrants & students (& chemists, ok? they had some talent there in the seventies, let me tell you). i have always been a counterculture wannabe.
& that part of me that always wanted to be is both delighted & honored to find my self, at my age, with a cause that is every bit as important as the struggles of the 60's and 70's, & (having had a life of major fuckup-related stress distractions in the interim), excited to finally be able to join a movement about something important & have that matter, even if only in the most infinitesimal way. because, what we have here before us today is an era in which the grassroots movement has been proven, in a decisive & undeniable way, to be the absolute perfect way to get shit done. we put an African-American in the White House because he was the right (electable) person for the job, how hard does that rock? in a less imperfect world, that wouldn't have been a big deal but in this one? yeah. "Congratulations on being a part of the decision that made this nation move well and with style." oh you betcha. this is the new stuff, i go dancing in ...
so in this new nation in which we can move with such style, well, what now? nothing rhetorical about that question, seriously, i'm asking ... what next? i've joined some groups & signed up for some things. i've been to the first protest of my life, and i brought my kids (including my 11 year old's friend who was over for the day & we all agreed we didn't need to mention this to his mom because she over-reacts). yeah, i snuck a tweenager over to a gay marriage rally because he personally believed in it & i want to encourage that kind of rebellion. also, i've always been the 'cool mom', the one that would rather be talked to than lied to. and in my daughter's adolescence that also made me the one that got the calls from VPD at one in the morning, & i held my counsel, & continued to be the one that wasn't lied to, & that's another story entirely. i digress, but i always digress, so ... deal with it.
i'll repeat the question, what's next? i do not require answers but appreciate them where applicable. i myself will continue to do what i do best, ping things & join things & make what noise i have time to make, which might not be all that much, considering. my point, if a rambling thing like this blog post has such a thing, is that i have found my cause, my civil rights movement, my larger thing in which i might be a very small part & have that matter, no matter how much.
i have to digress one more time, i would apologize but i'm not particularly sorry. you know who would make a great Secretary of State? John McCain. you know who would make a great Secretary of Health, Education and Welfare? Hillary Clinton. feel free to yell at me about that, or about digressing in such a completely random & less-than-sensical fashion. make some noise!
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/11/friends-they-may-thinks-its-a-movement/
i missed most of it. and for this, i suffered the loss of the full experience, and i regret it. however, considering i was up most of the night before with the heat & the winds & the allergies that felt like a flu, i accept that i did what i could. got up, got some Zyrtec (amazing stuff, fixed me right up), cleaned the car (it was bad), packed it with me & some kids, headed down to Mission Park right around the time the main protest was supposed to be ending.
it did not end then, nor had it ended by the time i left, an hour & a half after that. a core group of energetic anti-haters stayed and stayed and chanted and chanted and passers-by either honked & waved & thumbs-upped, or (and there were less of these) averted their eyes & pretended we were not there.
but we were there, we will be here, and we will not go away. ever. so get used to it.
[caption align="alignright" width="500" caption="we found this sign, adopted it, waved it, and passed it on to others when we left."][/caption]
i missed so much, but i still came away with such a feeling of love and pride. my two sons came with me, along with their friends. we waved signs, we chanted chants, we talked to some amazing people. and do you know what? there were more straight people there than not. there was such an amazing variety of right-thinking humans there making their voices heard for what is right. there were families, kids, grandmas, teenagers, and a drag queen or two in full regalia (assuring his friend that he was indeed wearing panties under his short skirt). there was a pretty young dark-haired girl who did not appear to know anyone there, with a small homemade sign saying Prop 8 was unfair & wrong. she did not wave it, nor chant; she stood off to the side with her sign, alone, not interacting with anyone, just being there for the cause. i refrained from taking her picture, it would have been intrusive i think, for she radiated shyness. and i might respect her most of all, just for getting out, just for showing up, just for standing up for what is right even though she was doing this, in her own world, all by herself.
because as i, and my children, and everyone who attended this rally today know, there is only one right thing, and that is our rights. civil rights, human rights. anything that everyone but a select few can do, is a right. anything that any minority is excluded from based solely on their status as a member of that miniroty, is a right that is unfairly granted to all who enjoy it. it's in the California constitution, still: “A citizen or of citizens may not be granted privileges or immunities not granted on the same terms to all citizens.” they didn't amend that with Prop 8. they can't. the fight is not over, yet. but there is no doubt in my mind that right will prevail.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/11/the-pro-love-movement/
you know, i don't usually do memes, but this one ... resistance is futile, i have been assimilated.
a while back, i was tagged by the incandescent Tangerine, aka CitizenX, and most recently, by the lovely Kara Sheridan, and i adore both of these ladies quite a lot. i have known Tangerine since when, she's a major geek, and though i've only known Kara since the Plurk era, i have come to admire her spirit quite a lot.
so that was step #1, link back the ones who linked you. the purpose of this, of course, is to do some excellent blog networking, and it is about time i was more social with the old blog thing.
Step #2 - write five fun/interesting facts about yourself. five things? and they all have to be interesting? sigh. let's see how this goes:
1. i am a rabid domain junkie, and own at this point 20 domain names, including but not limited to: lizard.tv, lizard.be, lizard.name, offtoseethelizard.com, olizard.com (matches my lic pl8s), and eight, count them eight, versions of my son's first name (kurtwood .com .net .org .tv .me .name .us .mobi -- i may not be able to pay for a great college, but my child will have his digital brand). there are others, of course. there are always more domains, and more i want.
2. i am not much into watching tv, but when left to my own devices i tend to watch nicktoons. i'm kind of an expert on the nicktoons. i own two entire tv series on DVD -- Due South, and Invader Zim.
3. there are a lot of things that might actuallly be *really* interesting i could list here, but i could not do that without the backstory -- and there is always so much of that. suffice to say that almost everything about me is a very, very long story.
4. in 2003 i started writing this thing that was like a novel, but not really. i built it its own content management system, the database of which i tweaked so that it is shared by my "poetry" site, through some seriously amateur MySQLing. i built database driven websites way before i was actually qualified to do so. the CMS i wrote counts words. the thing that's not a novel is over 50,000 of them that i will most likely never show to anyone.
5. wow i'm up to five already! that wasn't as bad as i thought it would be. ok, let's see, hmm, five. there is no fifth thing? nobody expects the spanish inquisition? ok how about this: i try really hard to be open minded and respect everyone's right to their freely expressed opinions, and as such maintain a few conservative social network friends. it is very, very difficult for me not to flame them silly. but i am open minded. i am open minded dammit! and there's no point in flaming. really. at least i keep telling myself that.
Step #3: Tag six other people. Then let them know you’ve tagged them by twittering them or leaving a comment on their blog. Now you know what's hard about that? i'm late in this game here, so many of the potential tag targets have already been hit. i do, however, highly recommend:
Linkmeister - an old, dear blog friend from back when. one of the more observant folks out there, always an enjoyable read.
Two Words: Not Always So - my friend and spiritual advisor, Daigan.
Puntiglio - excellent words and ... well, general excellence.
LaLa FuFu - the inimitable Tim Moore, a rabble rouser of sorts, and a serious geek with a serious gadget thing. dude has an iFamily.
CeeDubb - another rabble rouserish sort, seriously into the bike thang
ex-lion tamer - what is it with me and rabble rousers? the ever-progresive r@d@r, one of my best old blogfriends from back in the day.
well there you go. a meme. don't expect to see a lot of that sort of thing here.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/11/playing-tag/
i will confess i suffered a rather painful shock, last tuesday, when i clicked over from the transcendent presidential election victories to check the returns on the the fight against prop 8 to find it up by a good 10 points in the early returns. i could not imagine why it was doing so well, in an election where liberal candidates and causes were prevailing by a decisive margin. we came out to vote for hope, what the hell happened to hope?
i thought we would beat it. i really did. it's simple logic! the arguments for it made little sense, and were universally untrue. there was no threat to marriage, to children, to churches. nothing bad was going to suddenly start happening, the only possible result was that nothing would change, that people who had civil rights in california would continue having those rights. simple! logic! the thought that the electorate would come out in favor of writing discrimination into the constitution seemed surreal, especially in the context this historic election.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/11/proposition-8-and-the-failure-to-communicate/
it begins with an open browser tab & a text box, accessed whilst in an inadvisable condition to be operating such incendiary technology. it intends to be a confession of sorts, a catharsis, release. it hopes to be inappropriate in a way appealing enough to be its own excuse. it is, as we all are, doomed to end with far too many things unsaid & undone, interrupted as it were, in the midst of exactly what it was meant for.
it is a pink floyd on the headphones, second giant travel cup of wine, two hours of sleep type of disaster looking for a place to preserve itself in the most ephemeral of mediums imaginable, short of imagination itself. it may &/or may not make any sense whatsoever, but its intentions are pure i assure you. it means to express itself, in absence of the understanding of what *it* is.
waiting is.
i am almost resigned to this & yet true resignation is a holier grail than i will ever finally find. is it sad or triumphant that i fail to abandon these dreams? it is. almost.
waiting is.
it's just there is this one thing, this one love. neither of which exist therefore this waiting makes almost no sense at all. almost. & yet.
& yet. regret regret is what makes the least sense, what with no reason to bother with it, you know how that goes don't you? oh wait. you don't, do you? right. i forgot.
i forget stuff. not the stuff it would benefit me forgetting, just everything else. what remains is me facing what is left of & for me.
waiting is not going to solve anything. it is what it is, impossible. & i accept this, except when i don't.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/11/write-post/
civil rights. human rights. inalienable rights. it's what this great country was founded on, well, that and the graves of the natives we slaughtered so we'd have plenty of room to enjoy life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. hey, our creator endowed us. US. not them.
it's human nature to want human rights, and it is also human nature to deny those rights to other humans. how do those who struggle against the rights of others manage to reconcile this in their minds? not just a few stray assholes, mind you. we're talking a massive coalition of churches pooling their considerable resources have their opinions written into the rule of law. "So far, Proposition 8 supporters have poured $19,778,208 to outlaw same-sex marriage, about $1.6 million more than opponents of the measure. Add the two sides together and that's about $38 million. Imagine the good it could be doing elsewhere."
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/10/proposition-8-and-the-politics-of-hate/
my first social media addiction was digg.com. i started out slow, for the first year or so, digg was just an RSS feed in my google home page, one that was always populated with interesting stories. slowly, i began to get more involved, started to get social, made friends. i discovered that by connecting with people who were actively submitting good content, that i could create a kind of human news filter, that by following their submissions i could learn, be informed, and be entertained.
at the height of my digging, i would digg hundreds of stories each day - not all because i had read the whole article, because i also believed in supporting my friends, making sure they were rewarded for submitting quality content, because i knew that the numbers mattered. social media success is in many ways a contest, and i wanted my friends to win. supporting them was an instinctive thing on my part, because (having run a social website or two in my time), i understood the importance of encouraging the best contributors.
in an social media, or any type of social site, status matters. go to any forum, any group site of any kind, and you will find they have top users, people who have committed a good deal of time and effort to build a good reputation. these users have more credibility, and many times expanded privileges, by virtue of their contributions, their dedication -- it's about quality, and it's about trust.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/10/diggcom-social-media-fail/
i always preface these posts about major changes with "it's not done". and in this case that is especially true because it is *so* not done. it was so much work to make these templates functional. they were so pretty, but so broken, on so many levels. allegedly widgetized but the whole widgetality was completely non-widgety, so i had to figure out how to widget. i did that. and so many other things. and so many more to go. and why doesn't the_excerpt() work unless it's in the midle of a WP_MyQuery or whatever? i didn't like that thing. i must figure this out, if for no other reason than the random posts over <- there. sigh.
you do not even want to hear the long painful story of my migration from the now-dead-to-me movable type. suffice to say it involved copying the database, hacking directly at the MySQL, and approximately i forget how many runnings of the import cycle. i will be hunting down stray missing characters for a long time because it was like, three am and i didn't care anymore that the text editor was replacing stuff with weird diamond shaped things with question marks in there.
so of course it's not done. but is any website ever done? it never is.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/10/well-of-course-its-not-done/
tonight i will go to sleep (well eventually) with dreams already live & in technicolor in my periphery, delightful unreality into which i propel my self willfully into whatever this is, & whatever it will or will not be, in spite of what it was meant to &/or should have been.i have faced the past and found it mostly forgotten, those bits retained turned out to be less than i'd hoped they'd be anyway so fuck the past. fuck it. seriously.i am more alone now than i have maybe ever been but you know? i forget stuff. so forget that, i am most likely wrong about the memories of aloneness, probably they were worse than this, as if that matters? because, you know, no. it doesn't. matter, that is. my point is, that this now, which may or may not be the most, is still ... now, & therefore this is it. it is. it *so* is.
http://dotlizard.com/?p=1811
tonight i will go to sleep (well eventually) with dreams already live & in technicolor in my periphery, delightful unreality into which i propel my self willfully into whatever this is, & whatever it will or will not be, in spite of what it was meant to &/or should have been.i have faced the past and found it mostly forgotten, those bits retained turned out to be less than i'd hoped they'd be anyway so fuck the past. fuck it. seriously.i am more alone now than i have maybe ever been but you know? i forget stuff. so forget that, i am most likely wrong about the memories of aloneness, probably they were worse than this, as if that matters? because, you know, no. it doesn't. matter, that is. my point is, that this now, which may or may not be the most, is still ... now, & therefore this is it. it is. it *so* is.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/09/whatever-2/
i am an ardent supporter of Obama/Biden for president, and as i join my fellow liberal Democrats in celebrating a powerful and positive convention, i am terribly concerned about two recent incidents, and the potential consequences to the campaign. thing one: today, a number of liberal blogs including Daily Kos, a very detailed and well-researched post made the dramatic allegation that Sarah Palin's youngest child, Trig, was in fact her grandchild.
http://dotlizard.com/?p=1810
yesterday, my daughter called me to ask if her (and my) friend from (her) childhood could come crash at my house for a couple days. well, i forgot all about this, but today she called, and began to talk about a long conversation we apparently had yesterday. now, this was a specific conversation, in which the friend talked to someone who said that she'd have to ask her boyfriend, and that the dog couldn't come, and mentioned something about picking up kurtwood and meeting chris for dinner -- although we cannot be entirely sure exact names were mentioned, we are relatively sure that toads were. also some sort of 'grandma' person was mentioned in the context of a place to stay, and we know for sure that wouldn't have been me, my grandparents are long, long gone. so she was wondering why i never called her back. it's because i never talked to her. seriously. her sister was sitting right next to her while she had this conversation, so the conversation happened. i was fairly certain that i hadn't completely lost my mind between then & now, i very clearly remember leaving work, having a conversation about the toads with chris on the way home, and coming home and spending the next hour doing nothing but setting up the new TMobile @home phone. these are nice, crisp, sharp memories. but everyone involved was exceedingly curious. so we pulled up my call logs online, which are not subject to being lost by my phone crashing, or erased, i mean these are the phone records that homeland security would use to track my communication, if i ever turned out to be a terrorist. and the call, the call most definitely did not involve me, not with my phone, not with any phone on our family plan. but the conversation happened. she even called the other number she had for me, which had never been mine but it was in her phone book as mine, and the nice boy on the other end (who must have been having one of the weirder phone conversations of his life) was quite patient, listened to our weird-ass story, and assured us that phone was in a locker at the time of the mystery conversation, while he was at practice. we still haven't figured this out. but we're mighty weirded out, believe you me.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/08/the-for-real-twilight-zone/
a little more than ten years ago, i had my first cell phone, when digital phones finally came out & prices allowed ordinary folk like myself to possess these mythical devices that previously only rich doctors and coke dealers carried. the coolest thing i did with it was to put my home phone on call forwarding and take calls at the beach. man, that was teh awesomeness.a little more than ten years ago, i'd heard of the internet, but it wasn't until 1999 that i got my actual hands on an internet-connected 486 with a screamin' 33.6 modem & right after that i rented my very own shiny 486 from Rent-A-Center because this internet thing was the best thing i'd ever had my actual hands on, & within 6 months i had a job with the title of webmaster but that's another story entirely, actually.anyway. if, back then, some future dude had come up to me & said, "hey i'm a future dude, & i've totally been sent here to tell you that ten years from now, you'll be sitting in a funky beachside cantina eating a juicy ahi burger with one hand and playing on a thing called plurk on teh mobile internets on your qwerty-keyboarded telephone with the other, while you uploaded a very decent sized photograph you took with said telephone to a place called brightkite while you were listening to your music collection from a memory card the size of your pinky fingernail that held two ... get this ... two gigabytes yes giga, not mega, bytes of said music on a pair of stereo headphones that weren't even plugged into anything but the little controller thingy that you used to you know, control things like that" ... well i'd have thrown my fancy-ass CD walkman at future-dude's head and told him he was batshit insane, even though the term batshit hadn't even been invented yet. and then i'd probably have slapped him. in the face. with an ahi, had i had one handy.seriously.anyway. on the way home from the funky beachside cantina, walking up the stairs to my tiny beachy apartment, a particularly amazing song came on the bluetooth headphones. i set my beer down on the stairs, unclipped the receiver and attached it to my son (who was newly born when all that future dude stuff would have happened, if it had), and slipped the headphones in his ears. hilarity ensued.10 years of genius-hours invested in tech R&D: $gazillionsBlackBerry Curve with Bluetooth headset & huge/tiny microSD card: $200-ishwatching an 11 year old boy experience 'Several Species of Small Furry Animals Gathered Together in a Cave and Grooving with a Pict' for the first time: priceless
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/08/several-species-of-small-furry-animals-gathered-together-in-a-cave-grooving-with-a-pict/
For those of you who don't know, Ping.fm is a service which allows you to "Use AIM, GTalk, iGoogle, WAP, iPhone/iPod Touch, SMS or E-mail and let
Ping.fm relay your message to a multitude of social networking sites." The good thing about Ping.fm is that it allows you to use any of a number of tools (so that you are never without a way to post) and reach your contacts on a fairly comprehensive list of blog, social network, and microblogging platforms. This is also the bad thing. Without going into a lengthy, rambling explanation of why i think it's a bad thing, I think I'll just introduce you to two different (and entirely fictional) Ping.fm users, and give examples of their typical usage. Let us take, for example, a user called @JoanDoe. Joan uses many social media platforms, but the nature of her life means that she will be away from keyboard for a good part of the day. Joan updates frequently when she is at her computer, and participates in active discussions. When she's out and about, Joan usus Ping.fm when she has a particularly compelling bit of information ("Tornado!", perpaps followed by "Not in Kansas anymore! Have you seem my little dog?"). She also uses Ping.fm to upload photos straight from her phone, because it's a very handy way to do that, too. As you can imagine, it's not Joan, with her occasional, purposeful updates, that's a problem for me. The problem is typified by user @JeannieDoe. Right upfront I'll say that Jeannie is just a super-sweet person, naturally bubbly and friendly, and if you know her, chances are, you like her quiet a lot. Jeannie has joined pretty much every network she's ever heard of, and she uses Ping.fm to chronicle the details of her day-to-day existence in a way that insures that no one will miss a thing. The problem with Jeannie, if you subscribe to her in too many places (since there is no anti-Ping.fm on the receiving end to filter out duplicates), you will hear that she had fish sticks and tater tots for lunch, as well as the other 15 or 20 updates she broadcasts out ever day, everywhere you go. And the truth is, no matter how much you adore Jeannie, those tots are going to be pretty darn annoying the third or fourth time you read about them. Now let me make it clear I am not in any way referring to one person with either example -- the only reason I'm using these examples at all is that apparently i'm crazy and I want people to think I'm an asshole -- no, not really. It's just that it's my best way of explaining why I think Ping.fm is tolerable in some cases, and less tolerable in others. And my point, if indeed I have one, is that
http://dotlizard.com/?p=1805
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/07/what-is-mobileme-and-why-is-it-in-my-control-panel/
i love meeting new people on the intertubes, early on, i was inspired by this tweet from @chrispirillo: "I'm just saying, Twitter is serendipity squared - and not reciprocating followers is just... anti-discovery." and who wants to be anti-discovery? so when ProBlogger started his social media love-in, i dropped a handful of links in his comments, thinking, why not? and then proceeded to discover the answer to that: adding and/or being added as a friend in bulk does not mesh well with my own particular set of motives, and what i will call (for lack of a less pretentious term) "my friending philosophy". there isn't anything anywhere in that philosophy that is comfortable with the concept of clicking down a list of links and connecting with each and every one, because there's nothing in the way i use social media that would benefit from that.
http://dotlizard.com/?p=1802
the situation: four bizarre bounced emails received on a T-Mobile phone, at the phone's @tmomail.net email address, as SMS messages because they of course don't fit as text. two from SpamArrest, one from Yahoo, and one from "Midwest Computer" which seems to use the same "whitelist" approach as SpamAssassin. all received within hours of each other. indicating an unpleasant trend. i hate it when bad people soil the good email addresses of good people.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/07/the-tmomailnet-spam-assassin-mystery/
on my way home from work this evening, i made an 18 mile detour and came home with a terrarium (reptile habitat, with screened top) as big as the whole hatchback area of my kia. the price of such a luxurious piece of lizard real estate, if purchased retail, would be roughly $100. the cost to me, was about $3 worth of gas. Freecycle was founded in 2003 as a local group in Phoenix, and has grown into a force to be reckoned with:The Freecycle concept has since spread to over 75 countries, where
there are thousands of local groups representing millions of
of members -- people helping people and "changing the world one gift at
a time." As a result, we are currently keeping over 300
tons a day out of landfills! This amounts to four times the height of
Mt. Everest in the past year alone, when stacked in garbage
trucks!to participate, you simply sign up with a Yahoo e-group which asks that you follow a set of basic rules (see my local group's "Freecycle Etiquette") for posting, but leaves the rest up to the individual members. why should you Freecycle rather than give to a charity? certainly giving to a charity is less effort, especially if the charity picks up donations from your home. but to me, there is tremendous appeal to the of participating in a community where we help each other (especially in these tight financial times) by sharing things we don't need, with others who do. i even think that if we made more of an effort to support each other as a community, there would be less need for charity. that sounds awfully pretentious though, doesn't it? let's just say that i enjoy free stuff almost as much as i love giving away free stuff to nice people, and leave it at that. so if you think that Freecycling sounds like an awesome i have some helpful tips, based on my experience using the local Freecycling network.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/07/freecycle/
live today @ Techipedia, entitled Quantum Entanglements: the Social Media Scandalsand thank you, Tamar, for helping get the word out.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/07/guest-blogging-2/
this evening my son said to me "antivirus says i have a virus!" and i knew we were in for a long night. i've battled infections of Antivirus 2008 and i know it to be a very insidious enemy. well, Antivirus 2009 is new and improved with extra insidiousness! Antivirus2008 / Antivirus2009 attacks when you visit infected websites, and has a very aggressive installer, once it's popped up it is virtually impossible to click or do anything that doesn't grant the installer permission. It uses a logo/icon with the shape of the Windows Security icon, and the Windows logo colors; it is very carefully designed to look like a legitimate piece of software. once installed it pops up a bogus virus scan window with a list of viruses, none of which are on the computer. i will repeat: it does not find viruses! there may indeed be infections somewhere on the computer, but this software does not find them. it is a scam. it then tells you to buy a license in order to remove the non-existent threats. it will continue to pop up dire virus warnings every few minutes or so, and it can't be shut down. it is not possible to uninstall this software through the normal methods - either its own "uninstaller" or through Windows Program Manager. the difference between 2008 and 2009 versions, is that the 2009 version is capable of disabling existing anti-virus software - in my case, AVG free. after AVG dies (and this is the seriously insidious part), Windows Security Center then pops up and informs you you have no virus protection because Antivirus 2009 is not activated, and offers you a button to purchase a license from Antivirus 2009. further, the Windows Security Center alert logo appears in the taskbar, with a message that Antivirus 2009 is not activated, and says to click this balloon to fix the problem. they have managed to exploit the way Windows Security Center monitors the computer's protective software, in order to compel the user to purchase a license, and the user can initiate this process by clicking a button within the Windows operating system itself. seriously, get a Mac. haha, just kidding. i have Macs and PCs and i like them both, you're not going to get any of that OS-bashing here. a friend recommended Simply Super Trojan Remover, but i installed Windows Live OneCare first to see if that would do it. i've used AVG, Avast, ClamWin, Norton, and Macafee, but i'm most happy with Live OneCare, it is effective and (unlike most of the freeware anti-virus programs listed) it is not a system resource hog. before Live OneCare was even finished with setup, it had found and dealt with Antivirus 2009. i'd expected to do a lot more work to get rid of the insidious pest, but it was actually quite an easy fix.i am very impressed (and surprised) by OneCare's ability to deal with a very nasty infection. i guess it's not going to be such a long night after all. note: according to Miguel Campos, it might require more effort, but for now, i'm going to relax and be happy that the computer is suffering no further symptoms.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/07/antivirus-2009/
before all the scandal began, i was
about to semi-officially re-launch my old lyrics site. i built it from
scratch out of PHP, MySQL, caffeine, and obsession. i am not as proud
of it as i once was, it was my first ever attempt at a database driven
website, so not only is it so web 1.0, it's also got n00b written allll
over it. it does have a live flash chat thingy, that's sort of cool i guess. offtoseethelizard.comthe reason i built the site was because i love lyrics but hate those spammy lyrics sites with the obnoxious ads and the occasional outright attack-spyware, and i wanted a peaceful place to keep my own little collection of my favorites. it is also open to lyrics submissions (here!). i have considered the thought of implementing user accounts so my friends could use the lyricbase and be able to collect their own favorite lyrics and whatnot, but i'm not convinced that would ... you know, matter. after all, the interwebs are full of lyrics sites that have vast, vast libraries of lyrics they've content scraped from other lyrics sites, why would anyone but me want to bother? but anyway. also? life feels much better if you are not all bunched up in a wad.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/07/were-off-to-see-the-lizard/
before i was so rudely interrupted by my own addiction to drama, i was about to semi-officially re-launch my old lyrics site. i built it from scratch out of PHP, MySQL, caffeine, and obsession. i am not as proud of it as i once was, it was my first ever attempt at a database driven website, so not only is it so web 1.0, it's also got n00b written allll over it. offlife feels much better if you are not all bunched up in a wad.
http://dotlizard.com/?p=1793
This post is an attempt to archive and sort out the whole LillyAnn mess, which began when a popular member of Plurk began taking up collections for medical emergencies that were misrepresented. Subsequent investigations of her activities turned up many inconsistencies, lies, and a whole lot of plagiarism. The archived Plurk thread is here. on July 10, LillyAnn's daughter posted on Plurk
that her mom had been taken to the hospital, and needed money for
dialysis. A subsequent Plurk in which confusing information was
offered, has been deleted. This plurk
has accumulated around 1,000 responses including extensive discussion
as to the validity of the claims being made. The daughter has not
responded to this plurk since last night but has posted elsewhere on Plurk today.Initial requests for assistance referred to the paypal account
here, which is also linked from the 'Newsletter re: Health Problems'
linked below, which had been used in previous requests for assistance. The
daughter has stated that she is not allowed on social media, but has
navigated the social web with some skill, posting requests for
assistance on Twtter, Plurk, and (stating she had assistance), set up a ChipIn.com page which has, at this writing, collected $297.50. DaveJazzHands Stumbled and Dugg
this ChipIn page and stated in his Stumble review that "For those
desiring more information or creditials, please visit <<
http://www.selfgrowth.com/experts/lilly_calandrello.html >> or
<< http://www.linkedin.com/in/lillycalandrello >>.
Additionally, feel free to contact me and I will be happy to assist."
It should be noted that he has reportedly responded to inquiries he is
"not comfortable" giving out details such as which hospital Lilly is
in. UPDATE: i've tucked away yesterday's list in the "read more" area, and will briefly attempt to summarize the latest developments here. If you've not been following the LillyAnn Plurk story, this will make zero sense to you. @RohanPinto stated that he phoned Lilly's house, that a girl named Heather answered, and did not know of a Gabrielle.@CeeDubb confronted @RohanPinto about something that LillyAnn had told him, that she had provided phone counseling services to RohanPinto, and that his e-check had bounced. @RohanPinto then provided screen caps of PayPal transactions. @Cylithria has
contacted the local authorities in Hammond, IN, to check on the welfare
of Lilly. They confirmed she has received dialysis and is staying with
friends.@Talespinner stated that he was one of the first to donate and sent $100 through PayPal.ChipIn.com collected $357.50 on her behalf.If my search had not turned up extravagant and sometimes conflicting claims of education, credentials, and life circumstances, I'd never have given this a second thought. On the Plurk page, people continue to discover inconsistencies that suggest that the person creating all the pages with LillyAnn's information on them, has been taking content from elsewhere and presenting it as his/her own.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/07/research-a-work-in-progress/
i just moved servers, installed a fresh copy of MT, and started from my old 2004 text export. again. but this time i mean it. <edited>in the remote case that anyone is curious, this is what happened:
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2008/07/we-apologize-for-the-inconvenience/
one rule stands
that is there is no rule
i own one plan
that i will make no plans
strip this back defend with one word
understand
strip this back defend with one word
understand
the following is paraphrased :: 'it is nearly impossible to (be with) the spirits & remain silent'. the attribution, i am almost certain of :: carlos perez shuma, an ayahuasquero in the rainforest. (read this, k? k.) my point is maybe a bit oblique from here, but there it is --> we are composed of music. ever play some cool music for a baby? watch 'em, man, they rock. music is. deeper than instinct, it is integral to our existence (not just an atavism passed along in the course of existing) -- music is. you know.
show me the light but take it easy
no need to hurry, no need to worry
the patient is inoperable
the water is unstoppable
the phonies taking numbers
cannot hurt me anymore
anyway where was i? the cosmic serpent(s) the double helix the yin/yang twins (must i mention Popocatepetl and Iztacihuatl just because i love to spell them?) the caduceus of the AMA the twisted ladders of the shaman -- the inner reptilian alien -- the origin of knowledge exists within us, every one, within every cell of us, it is a song in three dimensional color, speaking in a language of colorful three dimensional song (we are all of us made of our own language)
sit still, stay alive it is essential
sit back, enjoy the ride, it's elemental
elements will show you things
that you don't want to know
yet you know things you've never heard
the moment ripe for guilt is past
so let it glide
your self control goes slipping past
hey, let it slide
lacking ayahuasca, i make do :: tequila, various herbal remedies, late nights letting dreams consume the sleeplessness (they are hungry dreams & not unreal at all, at least not any more than any thing else is, ya know?)
it has been some time since i've written & may be awhile before fullness is. i feel it though, i know it, & i am patient.
waiting is.
show me the light but take it easy
no need to hurry, no need to worry
the patient is inoperable
the water is unstoppable
the phonies taking numbers
cannot hurt me anymore
(lyrics in italics stolen wholly from john lombardo, as usual)
i love you all.
· · ·
ohbytheway let us not forget that douglas adams, the members of pink floyd & stephen hawking all agree :: keep talking
(we are all made of our own language)
"language is a virus from outer space" -- (wm. s. burroughs) (an individual who has indeed partaken of the ayahuasca / tree of knowledge / forbidden fruit / dude knows his molecules / oh go read the book.)
http://dotlizard.com/?p=1789
(i hope you have windows media nine)
of course i have the lyrics
i also write poems when california burns
we burn what sustains us & i would link you to fuel but it's not finished
yet
i have this thing with fire
http://dotlizard.com/?p=1788
so i've been thinking. pingspams. spamments. playing mostly with them around in my mind, tossing them around turning them this way & that furrowing my brow (then catching myself doing that & mumbling my browfurrow mantra 'botox botox botox' as i unfurrow the dang things) ...
& in the midst of this & the interest of understanding what was working what wasn't i had a look at the logs to see what i could see, because the logs show what mt-blacklist is (or was) doing.
& a discovery: it wasn't doing anything. dotlizard's mt-blacklist, whilst running, has never. had. a. spamment. to block.
what the?
b'lieve it's got something to do with the fact that my comment links are semi-clever faux-HTML 'comment' tags, which link to non-numeric filenames, & this, apparently, confuses the bots.
i feel less silly about my obsessive customization fetish now.
so i re-opened the comments, i figure, what the hell.
http://dotlizard.com/?p=1787
so have i mentioned that the lyricbase's list page & lyric display page (which is like, 99.9% of the site) are now XHTML compliant? no?
i blame dreamweaver mx 2004, for starting me down the slippery slope of validation. sure, sure, the static XHTML validates, but then you upload the page & pop a little dynamic content in it & head over to the wc3 & get smacked in the face with ... with ... hundreds of errors. hundreds.
so i hacked away at the picky picky picky little details, invisible to the nekkid eye, but i obsessed nonetheless. it was time to make it right. sure, the site worked as it was, but it always felt a little like driving a shiny red miata with an old pinto engine duct taped sideways in the trunk, hoping no one got close enough to smell the burnt oil. now, it feels ... like a newish kia, with a genuine kia engine, still under warranty.
or something.
· · ·
i live about a half mile from the fireworks, so i had to walk all the way from my apartment, past the apartment next door, up to the main street, then halfway down the block to get these pictures:
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2004/07/aaaaand-the-rockets-red-glare/
i was deep deep in some serious XHTML compliance when the sound bite whizzed past, so i can pass along is the general of it -- the president seems to think that the murderous mindset can't operate in a free democracy. or something like that. it's why terrorists hate democracy, 'cause when it's democracy they have to be nice, or else! or something. anyway, my point is, i think somebody's not paying any attention at all. i mean really, george.
http://dotlizard.com/?p=1785
i have this one month free trial of the newspaper (depressingly corporate story behind this, omitted) & so i read the news now, every day. depressing, except one thing -- saturn.
(depressing digression about where we'd be if we took all the time / effort / energy / money ever spent killing other humans & applied it to famine & disease & ignorance how healthy & well-fed & educated we'd all be by now & how well-funded as we reached for the stars but no...) omitted. imagine.
i wanted more saturn this morning, so i headed over to nasa.gov, which forwarded me straight into this lovely flash dreamscape & i sat here, sniffling, playing with the pretty flash, imagining.
and then i navigated over to the main site, nice work these geeks do, & marvelled at the pretty pictures. i love www.nasa.gov.
http://dotlizard.com/?p=1784
lavonne was right, it's blacklist that caused the comment weirdness.
however now that i am running without the protection of blacklist, i'm going to temporarily require the typekey registration. i think. i'm not sure. i'm still stressing about the the defaultness of the comment form(s) & the cookies. the fucking cookies.
we apologize for the inconvenience**
**bonus points for anyone the source of the douglas adams reference
http://dotlizard.com/?p=1783
the new mt is doing something no other version has ever done for me -- make me feel stupid.
at one point i was going to start from scratch & recode all my templates because this blog is a *mess* of templates. a bad, bad mess. so it's been on my list of things to do when monkeys fly out of my butt.
got any preparation h?
http://dotlizard.com/?p=1781
i'm sitting on the porch, typing this, because 802.11b wireless? they're giving the shit away. i mean literally. well almost literally, but pretty much, literally.
the internet's getting easier to face each & every day.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2004/05/eight-oh-two-dot-eleven-b/
this is the first time i've even *seen* the internet in close to two weeks (i think) i lost track.
i'm not even really back yet but ... cable is *way* fast.
ok i have stuff to go do i'm still working up to where i can deal with the email. i haven't even looked yet. hold me i'm scared.
i know there is much catching up. right now it is a little too much.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2004/04/way-fast/
things that bug me:
war
politics
religion
intolerance
the internet
upsetting television dramas (e.r., law & order, third watch, et. al.)
every single person i spoke to or saw today, more or less
my computer
money
the sound of sirens
wait. i can break it down a little more succinctly:
everyone.
and everything.
no wait. i got it. every*one* is part of every*thing*, technically.
so: everything.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2004/04/the-sound-of-sirens/
forty two minutes. unheard of. most of my logins lately clock in right around six minutes -- what i get for a quarter. i can spend a quarter. i really start balking at things like forty two minutes (buck seventy five) -- and that was two comments, two tagboard entries, and an email.
anyway, hi, i probably owe you an email! i try to compose offline but i'm not configured that way, so it's a struggle & let's face it -- i'm lazy. i'll obsess my ass off on things, which makes me look productive, but trust me, i hardly ever produce what i should be producing. usually because i'm obsessing on something else. but anyway.
today i lost a big chunk of my afternoon to a pen. and i wasn't even sure it existed.
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2004/04/space-other-wasted-things/
i imagine myself discovering newdifferent energies within my imbalanced chemistry, i even believe i've already done some discovering, based on evidence that i'll refrain from enumerating here (suffice to say it falls somewhere between hubris & arrogance, & leave it at that).
is it still low self-esteem if i suspect that my high self-esteem is somewhere between extremely optimistic & delusional, based on actual factual accomplishments? it doesn't matter, as long as there is a core within which believes in a basis not yet accomplished, even if it consists of some fairly far-fetched dreams. the quirky loser with big plans is always a fun character to play in any good story, and that's the worst that can come of this, anything else is pie. a la mode. with a cup of really fine, fresh coffee. in a beach house.
somewhere between extremely optimistic & delusional, which is fine by me.
so anyway.
i am sooooo blonde. and you know what? it like, totally fits.
so there's this wonderful dictionary online, we are talking in-depth reference here, which i heard of because they found kurtwood's and my photographs on the stock photo site.
they used mine for these: 101, 95, arachnophobia, Born, Brass, buick, busy, cocoon, darkness, darn, daughter's, decorate, decorated, digging, ensued, fastest, fear, five, halloween, hour, however, hundred, hydrant, inch, kid, knocked, legged, miles, ninety, override, per, regal, saved, southbound, speedometer, spelling, spider's, spindly, straighten, terrified, today, ventura, vs.
they used kurtwood's for: grass, hand, worth. they gave us nice credit for it & everything.
hmm. did i have anything else to say? i am soooo blonde, have i mentioned that?
http://dotlizard.com/posts/2004/03/creative-visualizations/

