Kellan's personal timeline, a place to collect and share things from Kellan's life.
Created by kqdavidson7 on Dec 7, 2009
Last updated: 03/03/10 at 05:37 PM
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The day that every goth kid you knew had been waiting for. Skin pigment was out, darkness, death and sucking blood was in. The kid whose head was once dipped in a toilet bowl is now at the top of the social pyramid.
Disney struck gold with a rising generation of preteens with sitcoms, musicals and movies. Suddenly it became cool to sing along with the T.V., all ages were united under Mickey Mouse, and there was no shame in a 20 year old knowing all the words and dance moves in a movie made for people half their age. Disney made it okay for middle-aged internet jockeys to take a time out from wiping Cheeto cheese into their mother's couch to count down the days till one of the teenie-bopper superstars turns 18 (I'm talking to you Miley Cyrus). Pedophilia has never looked so cool.
The ultimate revenge of the nerds. This movie was flipping sweet, gosh! "Vote for Pedro" shirts were suddenly being sported by all walks of life. Everyone fell in love with the awkward, monotone ginger named Napoleon with a "I do whatever I feel like, gosh!" attitude, and sweet dance moves. This movie single-handedly redefined the social hierarchy in high schools, as it became cool to wear dragons on your shirt, and keep a stash of "tots" in your jean pocket, and become a member of the Happy Hands Club.
Scooters in, bicycles out. Zipping around the neighborhood with your best friends on your shiny new scooter was the most thrilling and liberating experience a kid could ask for. From the cushioned handle bars that matched the rubber wheels, to the state of the art braking system, it gave block-wide adventures a whole new meaning. And a whole new ending. It's amazing how easily a 12 year old boy can flip over the handle bars as he barrels down that hill at the end of his street going 30 miles an hour. Yeah, great job RazorUSA.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_iZOcE27oIQ&feature=PlayList&p=616AB2E7A344D3B7&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=5
Gotta catch 'em all! These anime mystical animals battled to the death in this card game that evolved into a TV show, and movie. Recess was spent trading cards and allowance was spent at the neighborhood 7-11 on packs of cards praying for that holy grail of a card that you have spent weeks hopelessly searching for to complete your army of cartoon combat creatures.
EMO became the new mainstream at the start of the millennium as rock bands spilled their hearts, grew their hair, and squeezed into their younger sister's jeans. All you need is a guitar, black hair dye, jeans three sizes too small, and Voila! Instant chick magnet. Brooding and angst-ridden, sensitive guys became the new object of affection for teenage girls while the football studs were benched. Sorry jocks, not everyone can rock studded belts and black wrist bands.
Tamagotchis and Furbies cried, whined and digitally defecated their way into the hearts of Americans everywhere. If the care of these digital pets held any correlation with the actual ability to care for a pet, no child of the 90's should be allowed within 200 feet of a dog, cat or otherwise. These things were fun for two minutes and then it became a countdown till their double A's died so you could be relieved of their presence.
Skateboarding coming back into fashion in the late 90's brought in its wake some truly awful apparel options. JNCO Jeans were for the kid on the go who needed the space in his pants to smuggle a family of four across national lines, just in case the need arose. If you weren't wearing JNCO's, you wanted to be the kid who was wearing them, god forbid you wore a pair of Lee Pipes, social suicide.
This dance song took America by storm as children, parents, grandparents united in straight lines, moving in sync and wiggling their hips in a spanish song that could only be described as hypnotic. Constantly played and replayed at birthdays, parties, weddings, slumber parties and in your room, it is imprinted permanently in the minds of Americans. Does anyone even know what the words are, anyway? Who cares. All you needed to remember was "Heyyy MACARENA!" and you were golden.
Thats right boys, we've all seen your yearbook pictures. Front tooth missing, blue button down shirt and "the bowl." Rocking out like cabbage patch kids, it's really nothing to be ashamed of. After all, it was your mom that gave you that haircut. Love you, mom.
http://onceuponawin.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/win-pics-bowl-cuts.jpg
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